Day 4 - January 17th: Holy Tangerine snowcone!

Breakfast: 1/2 c. oatmeal with brown sugar and cinnamon. Lunch: 1/2 c. cottage cheese, a bowl of multigrain pasta with butter, kale and kidney beans, 1 orange. Dinner: Large romaine salad with red and green cabbage, 1 mini cucumber, onion slices, bell peppers, mushrooms, a little sprinkle of cheese, 2 tbs. light ranch and a little deli ham; 1 orange. Thoughts: Wow, I FEEL AMAZING! I just finished walking for 20 minutes at an incline of 8 and speed of 3.8. It was painful but I got thru it and the aftermath felt that much better because I did! My brain fog that I have enabled in the past with my destructive eating patterns is gone! This is huge because it usually lingers in my head all day. I have grown accustomed to it to the point I began to believe it was normal. Its good to know that you are not mean't to feel that way, because it puts you in an extreme state of unawareness. 10:15 a.m. Pearce got this little turtle toy the other day and I've noticed that he has been calling him "Frank". I assume he is refering to him as Frankin the turtle off of Nick Jr., although we never watch Nick Jr. so I really honestly don't know where he got it from; it might just be a coincidence. Anyway, while he was in the bath he told me to go get Frank so he could play with him in the water. So as I handed him the turtle and said, "Here is Frank," he quickly corrected me by saying, "That's not Frank mom, that's just a toy turtle, this is Frank," as he pointed to the empty space next to him. Haha Ever since he has been looking to the side of himself telling Frank to eat breakfast and make soup and put lotion on. It was super cute. He has quite the imagination. 11:35 a.m. I just had the sweetest moment with Parxy. He usually has a tough time getting to sleep. He wiggles and cries and the frustrated mom usually comes out in me but this time it didn't have to. I wrapped him up in a burrito and he didn't fight it at all! He looked up at me in amazement that I am his momma and that I love him. I felt an extreme sense of love in what was only an ordinary moment. Since I have been exercising my mind to change my perspective on ordinary things, I have had an intense sense of peace overcome me knowing that what I hold so dear in my life really won't be snatched from my hands because it is good and I am doing the best that I can to preserve the sacredness of of it all. I believe God's plan is for us to go forward doing good because it is desperately needed in this world. So as I looked down at my beautiful baby boy batting those long beautiful eyelashes, over those piercing brown eyes, I knew that in that cetain moment it was right and it was real and the only way it would disappear is if I myself would checkout..... And I didn't. 12:33 a.m. I just bit into an orange and suprised myself with an over dramatic reaction to its taste, and the reaction was genuine, I wasn't trying to convince Pearce it tasted good or anything like that, it was a reaction mean't for me! As I bit into that ordinary fruit, it was like eating a tangerine snowcone on the Fourth of July! It really tasted that sweet! I am not exaggerating! I do not remember the last time I had such a reaction to a natural treat until today. I haven't used very much salt or oil in my cooking in the last four days and I know without a doubt that this is why my taste buds are so excited and suprised! Wow! Note to self! 12:42 p.m. So I sit here panicking inside because I'm watching a movie with Pearce and I know that my house needs attention. Even at this very moment I am looking down at a big pile of clean clothes that need to be folded, and also a huge pile that needs to be washed. I am wondering what will happen if I enjoy this movie with Pearce and "Frank" and not worry about it, because I am not feeling it at all. Here I go.... I hope the atmosphere doesn't suck me into a black abyss.... ;)